I’ve been having a great time, and as the days go by, I’m becoming increasingly aware that this time abroad is really counting as a Life Changing Experience. DISCLAIMER: I’m going to talk about my feelings now.
I get frustrated a lot. My spoken Spanish still isn’t nearly as good as my written Spanish. I’m aware of problems with my accent that I need to work on. I can’t fully express my more complex opinions or make (good) jokes.
“Well,” you might say, “you’re not a native speaker, so you can’t expect to be perfect!”
Ehem.
One evening I sat in my room, rapidly alternating between different Spanish books and Spanish magazines, Spanish TV on, Spanish dictionary and Spanish pen in hand, trying to cram as much Spanish into my head as I could. “Why don’t I know this word?” I thought, “Why can’t I pronounce that one?” I was mad. “Why do I have yet to use this type of sentence construction in daily conversation?!” I stopped. I looked at my life. It dawned on me that I was going a little nuts in this pursuit.
Cramming is never the smartest way to go, but especially not when it comes to an entire language. Immersion is key, but achieving fluency is a gradual process nonetheless. Right now, I’m making an effort to keep things in perspective. Sometimes I lose patience, but when I think back to my first week here, I realize just how much my Spanish has improved. It’s hard to fathom. Most of the time, I REALLY understand people when they speak. Several things that don’t have English translations make sense to me. I am developing a feel for this language, a place for it in my heart. Aww.
In the midst of this self-centered reflection, what I have to offer to my readers is this: encouragement—nay, insistence that you learn a language if you want to. (I said “nay.”) It is very possible and very rewarding! One day, you’re still pronouncing the “h” in “hola” (hint: don’t), and the next, you’re creating beautiful sentences to describe hypothetical situations with appropriate use of verbs in the pluperfect subjunctive. Yes, I AM THAT NERDY.
Language-learning aside, I’ve been learning how to manage independently in a big city. I'm learning different systems of education, transportation, and communication. I'm feeling the clichéd study-abroad-induced changes starting to happen. Realizing my own strengths. Figuring out who I am outside of my language, my habits, my home.
I'll leave it at that for now, since this is only 20% of the way. I have four times as much left to learn as I have already learned. Or is that the way it works? I guess we'll see.
Thanks for reading :)
Much love,
Isabella
*Remember, there were actual goat-clones, this is not some cool new slang term I’ve invented. Or is it?
Word of the day BONUS EDITION:
guy (young man): el chabón, el flaco, el pibe, el tipo/el tipito
girl (young woman): la chabona, la mina/la minita, la piba/la pibita
You make a really good point about learning about yourself through the lens of another language--if you can't express yourself using the same methods (humor, clear insight, impressive vocabulary) as you would in English, who are you? Re-contextualized, re-"culturized", stripped of some things which you can take for granted: here you are! Still you! Still learning and re-adjusting! Frustrating, yeah, but still such a cool opportunity.
ReplyDeleteYay, the blog!
Lo mismo me pasó a mi! Me demorró mucho más que pensé mejorar a pesar de la imersión. Pero difícil darte cuenta cuanto has mejorado. Te cuento que yo me sentí mucho más cómoda con español después de dos meses, esto era un turning point para me. En el fin de este verano me dijeron que yo hablaba "indio como nosotros" (que orgullo!!) pero todavía dije "cinco cientos" en vez de "quinientos" mi última día. Como rió mi hermana.....bueno así es la vida de una gringa.
ReplyDeleteCuando vengas podemos conversar a ver que tantas son las diferencias. La mayoría de las palabras del día no escuché en Ecuador! Que divertido :)